Tinder date fat shaming

#1

This is a wicked response to a guy who sent a very detailed message about why he didn’t want date this woman, because she wasn’t a “slip of a girl”.

I like to think I come across as a confident, happy woman. But could this be the very reason you have targeted me? Did you see me and think “She has far too high an opinion of herself, she needs bringing down a peg or two”? I have to ask - we all know the internet is a dangerous place to be a woman with opinions

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#2

What I really love about it is how he distances himself from his views. “It’s not me that doesn’t think you’re slim enough, it’s my brain. It’s not me that doesn’t find you attractive, it’s my penis”. It’s like he recognises how awful they are but, somehow, still felt the need to put them in writing. It’s arrogant and it seems like she’s been lucky to realise was a ‘knobhead’ he is so soon.

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#3

Did you see the guys in the comments trying to defend him for being honest?

It reminds me of the Tim Hunt thing again. Men are allowed to be “honest”, but women can’t respond or complain, otherwise they’re overreacting.

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#4

I’ve not even dared look at the comments for fear they will make me, once again, despair for humanity.

You’re completely right that it’s like the Hunt thing, which was like Shirtgate which was like every other instance that a woman said ‘hey guys, not cool’. The repetitiveness and lack of imagination of the arguments reminds me of creationists and other denialists. There’s no way for moving the conversation forward because they don’t want a conversation, they just want to silence their critics. The nice thing is they’re not winning - more and more people are speaking out and while the backlash they face is awful, there’s a lot of support there too.

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#5

Now Facebook is getting in on the fat-shaming.

Facebook rejected a feminist group’s body positive event ad on ‘health and fitness’ grounds

"Cherchez la Femme is a monthly live feminist talkshow that will be targeting the issue of “feminism and fat” at its next event. They’ll be discussing fat acceptence, fat activism and fatshion, from a feminist, body-positive perspective.
. . .

Unfortunately for Cherchez la Femme and anyone else who’d like to promote body-positivity and fat acceptance, Facebook didn’t agree.

It rejected the group’s request to boost their post because, apparently, it didn’t comply with the company’s health and fitness policy.

. . .

The message appears to suggest Facebook has put a blanket ban on showing images of fat women, ostensibly to avoid fat-shaming posts. But if telling a feminist group to replace an image of a plus-size model with someone riding a bike isn’t fat shaming, what is? Surely the powers-at-be at Facebook can tell the difference between posts that are actually fat-shaming and those that simply depict fat women."

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